Generation “Sandwich”: why did the 50-year-olds not live for their pleasure

In the West, they – those who are forced to take care of both grown up, but do not think to leave the family nest for children, and about elderly parents – are called the “sandwich” generation. Their life passes in a vice between the “need” and “must”, and the places for themselves, their desires and hobbies, often does not remain in it.

When I was about five or six years old and I had a fun jumping around the room in the

evening, my dad and my mother told me: “Sit quietly! There are neighbors below, they came home from work, they are tired, you bother them!”And I tried to sit quietly. So I got sixty with a ponytail. In the apartment, children jump loudly in the evenings in the evenings. But if I ask their parents to do something, they say to me with politely hidden indignation: “These are children!”It is difficult to understand what is more here – the holy conviction that the child’s freedom cannot be limited, or the elementary parental laziness. But what’s the difference to me? I try to sit quietly again.

My generation turned out to be squeezed between the “adult centrism” of the 20th century and the “detentrism” of the new millennium

I remember very well how children were not even allowed to rest until 12 years old;I, almost a teenager, were sent to the country with my grandmother, and my parents went to the Caucasus or Latvia. It was very disappointing! Then the age qualification was slightly reduced, and my wife and I began to carry a little daughter at sea. But to take a five -year -old child to a restaurant – such an idea did not even occur to us, it seemed wild and ridiculous. This is a completely adult entertainment, they drink, smoke, dance!

Now they go to the restaurant with infants even in the evenings – especially since it is forbidden to smoke there. In a restaurant, parents will be given a children’s chair, pencils, books, toys – fine! Children, as it should be for children, scream, cry, dug them with juice, throw rattles on the floor. Moms try to calm them down. The rest of the restaurant guests are sitting with stone smiles: I wanted to have dinner in comfort, but – “these are children!”.

In short, we, who are now 50+, have not lived for pleasure. In childhood, we tried to please adults, now we are trying to please children – more precisely, to the parents of these children.

The squeezed generation is also a demographic reality: people began to live longer, but to give birth later.

More recently (by historical standards, of course!) People by the age of 45 managed to grow and send children to the independent life of children – and to bury parents. A third of their lives people lived under the care of the elders, the second third – they themselves took care of the children, but the third third they had not looked back at anyone.

Now everything is different – a man of about forty is a symbolic figure of the era, who rolls a baby stroller with a two -year -old baby with one hand, and drags a wheelchair with his other hand, in which his eighty -year -old father is naughty. Therefore, modern young people, as if anticipating their “squeezed” fate, strive – of course, with the help of parents – to extend the years of caressed childhood and carefree youth. They are in no hurry to create a family and have children.

But here – a trap. Comprehensive and long parental care will certainly turn out to be their close and demanding attention to the life of matured children. It does not happen otherwise: any investor, sponsor, and even a philanthropist always requires a report. You can break out of the vice of generations in one way – quickly flush out of the nest.

Smart column Yandex New Mini station (without hours)

In constant care for the senior and younger members of the family, you should not forget about yourself, because our psychological state directly affects the effectiveness of our help and support for loved ones. What can make your life easier? For example, a smart column that will brighten up lone evenings and help in the implementation of routine cases.

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